Things not to exclaim out loud in front of young children, or anyone for that matter

Coach:  It’s been so long since I’ve seen you!  You look great.  How’s it going?

Me:  It’s going awesome.  I’m losing weight everywhere.  Like, look at these pants (grabbing all the excess fabric in the crotch area), they’ve even big here!  I mean, who would knew it’s possible to lose weight in your vagina?

Coach: Uh, um, oh my god Nicole who says that?

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