Uh dude, it’s not your body

Lately I’ve had some of the strangest comments made to me.  Now sure, I’ve heard of shit like this happening to other women before, but I guess I was never fit enough that I fell into the category… until now.

Obviously, I’ve lost some weight.  I’m at 36 pounds and counting, and my body looks different.  Like really crazy there’s an entire oompah lumpa gone different.  I’m not “skinny” kids, not by any stretch of the imagination, but I’m getting smaller.  And it’s pretty common knowledge that I’m not done yet.

I have no idea what my “goal weight” is, but I am aiming for a goal aesthetic.  More than that, I have some performance goals I’m working towards.  And imagine that, getting faster and stronger also equates to getting physically leaner, and in my case, smaller.

So I’m trucking along.

But lately people, especially men, have found it not only appropriate but necessary to say things like:

Don’t put on too much more muscle, you’re going to start looking manly.

Or perhaps even more ridiculous and offensive:

Well whatever you do don’t lose so much weight that you lose your boobs (or sometimes your ass).

Husband, thank God, hasn’t said anything so idiotic.  I think he knows that I would smother him in his sleep.

But somehow, that makes it even WORSE.  These are random dude friends who somehow think that they have a right to not only make these types of comments on my body, but that I actually give a shit about what they think or how they feel about the way I look.

*sigh*

Sure, there’s a part of me that wants to be attractive to others.  But kittens, I’m not doing this for anyone else but me.  If I were, there would be no way I would be this successful.

 

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Surprising myself

Every week I take progress pictures and send my coach and update on my workouts and nutrition.  This involves wearing my teeniest tiniest bikini and standing in blaring fluorescent lighting.  So basically, it’s like my own personal house of horrors.  And I get to do it once a week.  Joy.

It’s gotten slightly less horrifying over time, as I’ve seen some nice gradual changes week to week, and comparing my week 1 photos to the most recent ones is pretty darn jaw dropping.  I’ve made progress, and progress feels good.

But I’ve gotta tell ya, this week I did NOT want to take those pictures.  I didn’t have a perfect week last week with eating and workouts, and while it was only a small slip up, after 7 weeks of being absolutely saintly I was sure I was going to balloon up and would know EXACTLY where that pizza went.

Added on top of that lovely fact that my body was in the middle of my once-monthly reminder that I’m NOT pregnant (thank god), I was bloated and cramping and crying at dog food commercials, so I was pretty certain that my body would reflect that as well.

But taking weekly photos is part of the gig, and so I did.

I was very VERY pleasantly surprised.  As with every week before this, I can see a noticeable difference in various parts of my body.  And while outwardly I feel like a beached whale over here, my stomach is actually flatter than it was even a week ago.

When I stepped on the scale I was even more impressed to see myself down a bit more weight, bringing my total loss so far to just over 18 lbs.  I can’t wait to hit the 20 lbs mark.  I’m so close I can taste it.

Moral of the story, trust the plan.  Every day I do my absolute best to work hard, to fuel my body well, and to make good choices that will lead me to success.  Even if it doesn’t *feel* like a great day, that doesn’t mean it’s not a day with a chance to build on yesterday.

What about you readers?  What victories are you celebrating this week?

Push it real good…

fat jeans

Operation Fit Bitch is in full effect over here.

Honestly, I don’t really know why.  I just woke up one day last week and kind of realized that I’m coming up quickly on my 2 year Crossfit Anniversary, and I’m sick of just being kind of mediocre at Crossfit.

Now don’t get me wrong, I walked into my box for the first time in late August two years ago sedentary, overweight, completely out of shape and terrified to try pretty much anything.  I’ve come a long way both in my fitness and my confidence.

Yeah, I’m still terrified of heights so things like pull ups, rope climbs, and even box jumps present a little bit of a complex challenge for me, but by God I’ve done them.  All of them.  And I’m brave enough now to at least *try* new skills or movements, whereas I never would have been before.

Recently I’ve realized that while Crossfit has helped me to unlock my potential, I’ve let myself become a little bit lazy in my workouts.  Yeah, they still suck.  Running outside in Florida in the summer will always suck, but when I analyze my mile times, my max lifts, or even the weight that I’m using for WOD’s, I realize it’s stayed pretty much the same for the past 6 months or longer.

No wonder my fitness is stagnating.  No wonder I’m *gasp* almost becoming bored with my workouts.

NO MORE my readers.  NO MORE.

Last week I enlisted the help of one of our awesome coaches to help me get out of my funk.  I know myself well enough to know I’m at the point with Crossfit where I’m either going to push it and get to a whole new level, or I’m going to quit.

I refuse to quit.

So here’s to week 1 of progress.  Stay tuned for updates, because it’s only going to get better from here.

When can’t becomes your crutch…

Do you ever get it in your head that you just can’t do something?

Come on, you’re human, just admit it.  Lord knows I do.  I’ve been better about it lately, and since starting Crossfit over a year and a half ago I am much more willing to at least try something that scares me.

But I’m stubborn as shit, and every once in awhile something ends up in the “can’t” basket.

Up until a few days ago, double unders were in that basket.

I would love to tell you that I practiced them religiously and just simply couldn’t get them no matter how hard I tried, but that wouldn’t be true.  Sure, I had practiced them.  For a few minutes at a time a few times a week, usually whipping myself in the shins or the ass and totaling maybe 50 jumps before getting frustrated and quitting.

When they showed up in any WOD I just did the penalty (at our gym it’s burpees) and never even tried them.

I had actually convinced myself that I didn’t care if I ever got a dub.  Didn’t matter.  Jumping rope is just as effective of a workout if you swing it once or twice and I’m not competitive or anything so it won’t matter if I never get them.

That was, until 14.1 was announced on Thursday night.  As most of you know, we are in the midst of the Crossfit Open.  The Open is a 5 week competition where anyone in the world can register to see how they stack up against Crossfitters everywhere, and against themselves.  The workouts are announced via a live broadcast on Thursday nights, at which point two of the big dogs go head to head and show us how it’s done.

Like every other Crossfit addict worldwide, I was glued to my laptop on Thursday beyond excited to know what the first workout would be.  Because the Open is truly meant for everybody, I was confident it would be doable movements and something I could totally excel at.

Imagine my dismay when they announced a 10 minute AMRAP (as many rounds/reps as possible) of 30 double unders and 15 snatches (75/55).

Um what?  The FIRST movement that you had to do in order to get ANY reps whatsoever were DOUBLE UNDERS?  And I had yet to ever successfully do even one.

I wish I could say that I put on my happy face and decided to give the workout all I had, but I can’t.  The truth is I went to bed that night telling hubs “well this sucks.  I guess I’m taking a 0 for the first workout because I don’t even see the point in trying.”

I woke up the next morning, the day I was to do the WOD, and just didn’t want to go.  I got to the box early and practiced for a solid 15 minutes.  I managed about 3 reps in that time, and truthfully, they were almost accidental. But I was going to try to do the workout Rx.  I wanted a score.  Even 3 reps was better than 0.

The clock counted down 3…2…1… and a funny thing happened.  Suddenly, getting double unders became important.  Not being able to do them just wasn’t acceptable anymore.  I had to figure it out.  And I had 10 minutes to do it.

I’m not going to say it was fantastic.  In fact, it was a tough and frustrating 10 minutes.  But by the end of it, I had managed 27 reps.  Mind you, I never even made it to the barbell or finished a complete round, but whatever.  It wasn’t a 0.  And for ME, it was a PR.

But what’s more, by the end of just 10 minutes of consistent practice with a clear goal in mind, I was actually stringing a few of them together.  I knew that if I had ANOTHER 10 minutes, I could do a lot more.

I’ve never repeated and Open workout before, but after taking the weekend to think about it, I decided I just couldn’t let that score of 27 stand.  Not because I cared about my standings, but because I KNEW I could do better.  That simply wasn’t my best effort, which isn’t ever ok by me.

Monday is the last day to submit scores for the week, so I went in early for class.  I warmed up alone and set up my barbell.  This time, I knew I would need it.

I grabbed a judge and asked them to count and time me, and set out with one goal in mind.  Get thru one round.  45 reps in 10 minutes.  I knew if I made it through the dubs I was home free.

What a different experience the second time around.  I was stringing together doubles in sets of 3-4, and at around the 5 minute mark I was done with 30!  I flew through the over head movement, and got back on the rope as fast as I can.  With just under 4 minutes left, I knew I could make it through one more round of jumps.

AND I DID.

Not only did I, but I managed a few more overheads before time ran out.

Final score, 78!!!

I won’t lie, I almost started crying.

See, it doesn’t matter to me that the top competitors in our region and the world managed 450+ reps.  It matters that I did something I had NEVER done before.  I let go of the “can’t” and found the will to figure it out.

That my friends, is what is beautiful about the Open.  So many of us do Crossfit to push ourselves out of our comfort zones, and then still end up sitting there anyway.  Sure, the zone has become bigger than what it maybe was before, but it’s still there unless we continually challenge ourselves.

I won’t rest.  I will grow.  I won’t fall victim to “can’t.”

Thanks Crossfit.

1.21.2014 Workouts

Feeling a little sore, but it feels good to be back in the swing of things.

Crossfit:
SWOD: Press 5×5 (33, 53, 53, 58, 58, 58)

The last two sets were really tough, almost didn’t make the last rep of the last set.  I am, however, pretty pleased to see I haven’t lost much strength on this lift.  This is about where I was at before my hiatus on the longer sets.

WOD:
4 RFT
Run (row) 400
12 sit ups
24 DUs (or 2 bupees and 24 SUs)

Time: 16:49 with row and SU’s

This was fun.  I actually really like these types of WOD’s where the name of the game is just to keep moving.  

Now if I could just get double unders….

Bike:
30 minutes on the spin bike at a steady pace.

Gym:
Met Blondie at the gym for a quick workout in the afternoon.  We did a 20 minute circuit of:

4 Rounds
:45 seconds on :15 seconds rest

DB Thrusters
DB back fly
DB lunges with biceps curl
Plank with side twists
High Knees

Then we followed it with a quick core circuit of:
10 opposite hand to foot crunches each leg
10 db twists
10 super mans 

2 rounds

It was a fun little workout and a nice compliment to Crossfit.

1.20.2014 Workouts

I have been such a lazy blogger.  I’m “temporarily retired” at the moment, which should mean I have gobs of time to update my blog and entertain my loyal readers, but what it actually seems to be translating into is that I’m NEVER at my computer.  Wow.  Who knew I wasn’t really THAT addicted to technology?

Anyhoo, rather that bore you to the point that you want to eat gobs of chocolate with all my workouts since last week, I’m just starting fresh with today.  Goals not really hit last week, but I made forward progress so I’m focusing on the positive.

Crossfit:
SWOD:  Front Squat 5×5
3×10 single leg RDL
3×10 steps R and L in little circle band

Front Squat Was:
1×10 zombie @ 33
3×5@ 53
1×5@63
1×5@ 53

Still battling to get my “oomph” back.  I know the strength will come back eventually, but it’s frustrating as hell to be struggling with half of what I used to be able to squat no problem.

WOD:
8 minute AMRAP
5 hang power cleans
5 shoulder to OH
**10 DL penalty every time you drop the bar**

Score:  Honestly, no idea?  I used 53 lbs (65 was Rx, and I could have done it, but I would have ended up doing a LOT of DL methinks).  I did 4 rounds total of DL, but literally could not tell ya how many rounds of the actual workout I did.  I kept breaking on something silly like my 3rd power clean, so my brain had to remember 10 deadlifts, then that I still needed to do 2 more cleans, so all the other numbers fell out of my head.

Oh well still a great workout.

Cycling:

First time on my bike outside in almost 10 weeks!  Due to a bunch of medical complications, I had to put riding on the back burner for a loooong time.  I was SO excited that it was sunny and warm enough today to get out there.

Did an easy 10 miles at a 15ish mph pace.  I’ve definitely lost some endurance, but man I LOVE my new bike.  I barely had a chance to break it in before my hiatus, and I’m really excited to put in some miles to get ready for an upcoming 65 mile ride the last week in March!

1.8.2014 – 1.10.2014 Workouts

I don’t normally do posts with more than one day, but I’m a bit behind and figured I would do a quick catch-up-and-prove-I-really-did-it post.  🙂

1.8.2014

First day back at my box in almost 7 weeks.  I almost didn’t go.  In fact, I put it off all the way until 4:30 before I finally worked up the nerve to do it.  I publicly called myself out to the group to give myself the accountability too.

Man I’m glad I went.

Warm Up:  Still the usual.  Except I felt like I might DIE half way thru.  That’s new.  Let’s hope that passes quickly.

Mobility:  Hamstring stretching with the bands.

SWOD:  Snatch Deadlift 5×5? @ 53 lbs

I honestly don’t remember the rep scheme on this.  Coach said to keep the weight at 55% of your 1 RM  Snatch, but my 1 RM Snatch IS 53 lbs, so I just went for it.  Obviously, this was really light, but my mantra quickly became “I want to be able to walk tomorrow” so I was ok with light.

WOD:
21-15-9
DB Squat Cleans
DB Push Press

Time: 8:47 @ 10 lbs dumbells

The only movement I hate more than Wall Balls are DB squat cleans.  These bitches are my nemesis… and honestly the reason I almost didn’t go to class.  But I did them.  They sucked bad.  The whole workout sucked bad.  That’s what I get for taking so much time off.

1.9.2014

Went to the 9 a.m. class.  I’m not working at the moment, so I’ve got a lot of flexibility with my schedule.  I LOVE my 6 a.m. peeps, but can’t convince myself to get out of bed that early when I have no real reason too.  I’m probably going to bounce around to a few of the classes to figure out where I fit best.

Warm Up:  Usual stuff.  Super awesome girl coach was coaching this class, which I liked.

SWOD:  Snatch Balance 5×3 @ 33 lbs

Again, I kept this really light.  I did make an attempt at 43 lbs but just couldn’t get my arms locked out fast enough.  After failing the rep I scaled it back and finished up at 33.  Lots of time to get stronger, and I want to be able to walk tomorrow (are we sensing a mantra here?)

WOD:
10 minute AMRAP
5 ball slams
10 HR Push Ups
15 Hollow Rocks
20 Double unders (or 2 burpees + 20 single unders)

Score: 5+15 with 15 lbs ball and SU

I love AMRAPS.  You can’t finish last.  And I actually really liked this AMRAP.  The gymnastic-y movements tend to be my favorites.  I practiced DU’s for a few minutes before and still can’t do even one.  I want this skill bad.

1.10.2014

Today went to the noon class.  Went out with hubs and another one of the boys last night and had a late (for me) night that had one too many hard ciders as part of the line up.  Sleeping in was my friend.

Turns out Super Awesome Girl Coach was coaching this class along with one of our 6 a.m. ladies, the New York Ninja, who is a new coach at our box.  I had heard a rumor that she got certified and was SO EXCITED to be in her class.  She is one of those amazingly athletic women that makes you want to either hug her or punch her when she gets her DU’s on her FIRST TRY EVER.  I remember when she and her hubs joined about a year ago, and I’m really excited to work with her.

So anyway, onto the workout.

Warm Up:  Usual Stuff + some fun hip mobility stretches from the Ninja.

WOD:
11.5
20 minute AMRAP
5 power cleans
10 toes to bar
15 wall balls

Score: 185 @ 53 lbs on power cleans, toes to bar done on the ground, wall balls at 10 lbs

Obviously, I did this VERY scaled, and am glad I did.  Other than the t2b I physically could have done it Rx, but it would have taken me the full 20 minutes just to do the power cleans I think!

I love doing the Open workouts though.  Until the Open kicks off we’re going to be doing one every Friday.  I’m stoked.  I want to beat some of my scores from last year.  I am definitely not in as great of shape as I was last year, but I have over a month to improve as much as I can, and I can’t wait for the energy and excitement again this year.

11.25.2013 Workouts

Crossfit:

Back at Crossfit for the 6 a.m. class.  Love those guys, and actually missed them.  Didn’t so much miss the walking up at the butt crack of dawn and the vomit inducing workouts… ok so maybe I missed that too.

Warm Up:  The usual stuff.  Coach did tease us that after the holiday’s we’ll be changing it up.  Fun.  I love when we stick new stuff in the warm up because I usually find a new weakness I didn’t even know I had.

SWOD:  Front Squat 3×8
1×10@ 33 for zombie squats to warm up
1×8 @ 53
1×8 @ 63
1×8 @ 73

This wasn’t too bad.  I likely could have added a bit more weight for that last set, but I still struggle with the pressure of the bar on my throat during front squats.  I really really don’t like choking myself.

WOD: Diane
21-15-9
Deadlifts
Handstand Push Ups

5:06 @93 and regular push ups

This was both a PR in time (18 seconds) and weight (10 lbs) from the last time I did this WOD.  I am super proud of that.  Gotta love progress.

I also looked back to see what I had to say about the last time we did this benchmarck in August and was really surprised to see what I wrote.  Apparently, at the time 83 lbs and push ups unscaled intimated me!  Today I didn’t even bat an eye about the push ups, and loaded my bar with 83 right off the bat.  With a little encouragement from a class mate I added more, and easily managed the weight.

Progress is really an awesome feeling.

Swim:

Post-Crossfit swim.  Honestly, I really REALLY wasn’t feeling it today at all, so I just hopped in and swam 1500 straight.  About half way thru a guy jumped in and raced me.  I won.

I have no idea if he knows we were racing or not.

1500m in about 35 mins

Bike:

11 miles at a 15ish pace with the crew.  The 22 mph winds were really a nice touch.  Ok, not really.  They really blew.  Heh heh. See what I did there?

Weekly Workout Plan

As you might recall, I had a bit of a rough start to my week last week.   But once I bitch slapped myself back into reality, and wrote out my confessions and made a plan, I went out there and got it done.

Last week ended up being a really strong week for my tri training.  Granted, I didn’t set foot in the box, but I’m proud that I snapped out of it and didn’t wait until Monday to “start over.”

This week being a holiday is a short week at work for me.  I’m also traveling to St. Louis to hang with the in-laws for Thanksgiving AND flying home in time to go to the Florida/Florida State game on Saturday!  (Whoo hoo ‘Noles!!!)

Obviously, all that travel could sabotage my training, so building on my lessons learned last week I’m making a plan to ensure I get it done.  It looks like no matter how I slice it I’m going to be short a swim this week, but of all the sports that makes me the least amount of squirmy.  I’m already physically capable of covering the distance I will race, though I would like to do it much faster than I am at the moment!

As always, feel free to hold me accountable, because lord knows I need it.

Monday 11/25
Crossfit AM- Done
Swim AM- Done
Ride- Lunch, 10 miles with group

Tuesday 11/26
Crossfit AM
Swim AM- 1500m
Ride- Lunch, 10 miles solo

Wednesday 11/27
Travel day, off

Thursday 11/28
Run AM- 3 miles
Bike AM- 30 minutes (stationary at the hotel… yuck)

Friday 11/29 (travel)
EITHER
Run AM- 3 miles/ Travel WOD
OR Crossfit AM- drop in on a box

Saturday 11/30
FSU Game- Off

Sunday 12/1
Bike AM- 25 miles

So what about you, readers?  How are you fitting fitness into the holiday this week?  How do you stay active when you travel?

I need a plan

I woke up this morning and wished the hubs a happy hump day.  Doh.  Clearly, I have no idea what day it is, and while I love being closer to the weekend, I can’t believe this much of the week is gone already.

Last Thursday was the last time I did a planned workout.

I’ve skipped everything on my training calendar since then.

Do I have a hundred excuses?  Yup.  Are a few of them actually pretty good?  Of course.

But the fact remains that as of today it has been 1 week since I’ve done anything to help me reach my goals.

And since you all know me, you realize this also means I’ve been eating and drinking too much and have just generally been a hot mess.

I was talking to a friend yesterday about Crossfit and felt like such a fake.  Last time I went I PRed my clean and jerk, and haven’t set foot in the box since.

Thanksgiving is in one week.  Christmas just over a month.  Vegas right after that.

Not to mention I’m doing a freaking TRIATHLON in around 5 months.

I don’t have the time to skip training, and good excuses or not, I need to find a way.

This morning I woke up and my first thought was, “I don’t need more excuses, I need a plan.”

Part of me just wants to pick up the training that I was supposed to do this week starting with today, but because of the upcoming race I really do need to prioritize some workouts over others.

I need to get on the bike at least twice before Sunday, and one of those needs to be a long ride of at least 25 miles.  I need to run at least twice as well.  Swimming twice would be a good thing too.  I don’t want to ignore Crossfit, but with all of that to fit into 4 days, I’ve got my work cut out for me.

So for the sake of accountability, I give you my readers, my training schedule for the remainder of the week.  Feel free to check in with me, to keep me accountable, or to just cheer me on and I cross the workouts off the list.

Thursday 11/21
Lunch Ride- 10 miles @15-18 mph pace (group)
**Done- 10.3 miles @16.5 mph average by myself on tri bike
After Work- 2 mile run @ easy pace
**Done- on treadmill @13:30 pace

Friday 11/22
6 am- 1500+m swim
**Done- 2000 m in approx. 45 mins
7 am- 9 mile bike ride @ 14-15 mph pace (group)
**Done 9 miles @ 14 average pace

Saturday 11/23
AM- Long ride 25 miles @15-17 mph pace
**Done on the NEW BIKE at 15 mph pace exactly (1:40)
PM- 1500 swim
**Moved to Sunday- Done 1500 in about 35 mins, bricked with run

Sunday 11/24
AM-  3 mile run
**Done, right after run.  On the treadmill.  First mile really had trouble convincing my body that it actually wanted to run, but smooth sailing after that.  41:30

That looks like a lot, but really it’s not at all.  I need to just gently remind myself that it’s well within both my comfort zone and my abilities.  When I successfully complete this, while some damage will have been done from my week of laziness, I still will have logged some miles towards my tri training and won’t be in as bad of shape as I could if I let this lazy streak keep going.

I already have next week planned out, and will really need to stick to the plan as there is a holiday and travel in there.  Skipping a workout early in the week won’t help me one bit, and I will do my very best to hold myself accountable.

What about you?  Have you ever just not wanted to workout?  How long did it last?  How did you get yourself back into the swing of things?