I didn’t know there would be running…


Hey guess what?  Getting better is hard freaking work.

Three weeks ago when I started working one on one with a coach to help to improve some of my many Crossfit weaknesses, I was totally pumped and ready to go.

“I want better endurance,” I told her.  “My lungs always go before my legs.  And my heart rate goes really high really fast.  I want to be able to string together movements better.”

“Ok, ” she said with a devious smile.  I shoulda known.

It’s amazing coming from a triathlon background to recently realize that endurance is my limiter.  Lift a really heavy weight anywhere between 1-5 times?  Sure, no problem.  Lift it 10?  Eff you buddy, I don’t wanna.

When did that happen?

I distinctly remember starting Crossfit and loving it because so many of the movements were things I had never done before.  I wasn’t comparing myself to the “in shape” version that used to do triathlons, because there wasn’t much swimming, biking or even running in the workouts.  I didn’t ever feel bad that I was not measuring up to what I knew myself to be capable of, because we never did that shit.

Instead I was learning new movements and working out with really big WEIGHTS; things I had never tried before.  And things that I turned out to be pretty darn ok at.

Now that I’m at the point where I have a super secret goal of *gasp* competing, I need to look at myself more holistically as an athlete, identify those gaps, and train those weaknesses.

Which is what I’ve been doing for nearly three weeks now.

It sucks.

My “homework” every week is a list of movements that, given the choice, I would rather have a bout of diarrhea than do.  Lots of jumping.  And running.  And core.  And shit in sets of 10.

But you know what?  Yesterday before my session I ran a timed mile and did it nearly 1:30 FASTER than my first attempt just 3 weeks ago.

Is there a little nagging voice in my head reminding me that I’m still almost a minute off of my half marathon pace (from five freaking years ago)?  Sure.  But you know what, that voice can shut the f*ck up.  I’m improving, and working my ass off to do it.

This is just the results after 3 weeks.  Is anyone else as excited as I am to see where I end up in September?

Push it real good…

fat jeans

Operation Fit Bitch is in full effect over here.

Honestly, I don’t really know why.  I just woke up one day last week and kind of realized that I’m coming up quickly on my 2 year Crossfit Anniversary, and I’m sick of just being kind of mediocre at Crossfit.

Now don’t get me wrong, I walked into my box for the first time in late August two years ago sedentary, overweight, completely out of shape and terrified to try pretty much anything.  I’ve come a long way both in my fitness and my confidence.

Yeah, I’m still terrified of heights so things like pull ups, rope climbs, and even box jumps present a little bit of a complex challenge for me, but by God I’ve done them.  All of them.  And I’m brave enough now to at least *try* new skills or movements, whereas I never would have been before.

Recently I’ve realized that while Crossfit has helped me to unlock my potential, I’ve let myself become a little bit lazy in my workouts.  Yeah, they still suck.  Running outside in Florida in the summer will always suck, but when I analyze my mile times, my max lifts, or even the weight that I’m using for WOD’s, I realize it’s stayed pretty much the same for the past 6 months or longer.

No wonder my fitness is stagnating.  No wonder I’m *gasp* almost becoming bored with my workouts.

NO MORE my readers.  NO MORE.

Last week I enlisted the help of one of our awesome coaches to help me get out of my funk.  I know myself well enough to know I’m at the point with Crossfit where I’m either going to push it and get to a whole new level, or I’m going to quit.

I refuse to quit.

So here’s to week 1 of progress.  Stay tuned for updates, because it’s only going to get better from here.

Murph… Not just another workout

Memorial Day Murph

It’s been over a week since I had the honor of completing another Memorial Day Murph with my Crossfit family.  I’ve sat down to write this post a number of times, but it seems like every time I started words just seemed to fail me.

I think it’s because this WOD isn’t just another workout.  It isn’t just another day at the box.  It isn’t something I want to chronicle so I can compare my time and scaling to last year; it’s something I want to write about because it means something to me every time I find the strength to do it.

The short version is that this year the workout was harder than I remembered.  The day was hotter, the box was much more packed, and I finished slower than I did in 2013.  I did ring rows instead of kettle bell swings (the scaling we did in 2013), and I did all the pushups starting and finishing on my toes.  After 100 that felt like a bad idea.  After 200 I couldn’t take my bra off and had to enlist my husband’s help, but I’m glad that I did it.

My Crossfit family is amazing.  Around me for the entire workout were fellow members sweating and cheering me on.  We were all deep in the suck together, but no one quit.  In the end, as one of the very last to finish, I had my own cheering section and even a personal coach who “ran” (if you could call it that) the last mile with me.  She had already completed her workout, but pushed me along just the same.

I get a little emotional every time I think about the mental aspect of this workout.  Physically, it’s challenging.  But mentally, the number of times that I had to push myself to keep going, to talk myself out of just quitting, or of cutting it down a few reps, or any number of other ways I could have “cheated”, was really the biggest challenge for me.  It’s amazing how our inner demons, the voices who tell us we’re not strong enough or good enough to do something, really come out when we’re struggling.

Which makes me wonder what our soldiers hear in their heads during their tough times.

In the end, so much of what helped me through was thinking about that.  Murph is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life.  It’s one of the biggest challenges I will ever face, and one of the toughest things I will ever need to conquer.  Talk about a blessing.  When doing a hard ass workout, that I PAY a facility to subject me to, surrounded by friends, and fun is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done I KNOW I lead a great life.

I have so many things.  So many freedoms.  Like everyone I have so many problems, but unlike some of our soldiers, mine are really inconsequential.

While this is a post about a workout, this is really more of my trying to say thank you.  To express my gratitude to those who have served and are serving for all they stand for a represent.  To remember those who won’t ever come home to us, not that we don’t remember them for at least a moment daily.

So thanks guys.

When can’t becomes your crutch…

Do you ever get it in your head that you just can’t do something?

Come on, you’re human, just admit it.  Lord knows I do.  I’ve been better about it lately, and since starting Crossfit over a year and a half ago I am much more willing to at least try something that scares me.

But I’m stubborn as shit, and every once in awhile something ends up in the “can’t” basket.

Up until a few days ago, double unders were in that basket.

I would love to tell you that I practiced them religiously and just simply couldn’t get them no matter how hard I tried, but that wouldn’t be true.  Sure, I had practiced them.  For a few minutes at a time a few times a week, usually whipping myself in the shins or the ass and totaling maybe 50 jumps before getting frustrated and quitting.

When they showed up in any WOD I just did the penalty (at our gym it’s burpees) and never even tried them.

I had actually convinced myself that I didn’t care if I ever got a dub.  Didn’t matter.  Jumping rope is just as effective of a workout if you swing it once or twice and I’m not competitive or anything so it won’t matter if I never get them.

That was, until 14.1 was announced on Thursday night.  As most of you know, we are in the midst of the Crossfit Open.  The Open is a 5 week competition where anyone in the world can register to see how they stack up against Crossfitters everywhere, and against themselves.  The workouts are announced via a live broadcast on Thursday nights, at which point two of the big dogs go head to head and show us how it’s done.

Like every other Crossfit addict worldwide, I was glued to my laptop on Thursday beyond excited to know what the first workout would be.  Because the Open is truly meant for everybody, I was confident it would be doable movements and something I could totally excel at.

Imagine my dismay when they announced a 10 minute AMRAP (as many rounds/reps as possible) of 30 double unders and 15 snatches (75/55).

Um what?  The FIRST movement that you had to do in order to get ANY reps whatsoever were DOUBLE UNDERS?  And I had yet to ever successfully do even one.

I wish I could say that I put on my happy face and decided to give the workout all I had, but I can’t.  The truth is I went to bed that night telling hubs “well this sucks.  I guess I’m taking a 0 for the first workout because I don’t even see the point in trying.”

I woke up the next morning, the day I was to do the WOD, and just didn’t want to go.  I got to the box early and practiced for a solid 15 minutes.  I managed about 3 reps in that time, and truthfully, they were almost accidental. But I was going to try to do the workout Rx.  I wanted a score.  Even 3 reps was better than 0.

The clock counted down 3…2…1… and a funny thing happened.  Suddenly, getting double unders became important.  Not being able to do them just wasn’t acceptable anymore.  I had to figure it out.  And I had 10 minutes to do it.

I’m not going to say it was fantastic.  In fact, it was a tough and frustrating 10 minutes.  But by the end of it, I had managed 27 reps.  Mind you, I never even made it to the barbell or finished a complete round, but whatever.  It wasn’t a 0.  And for ME, it was a PR.

But what’s more, by the end of just 10 minutes of consistent practice with a clear goal in mind, I was actually stringing a few of them together.  I knew that if I had ANOTHER 10 minutes, I could do a lot more.

I’ve never repeated and Open workout before, but after taking the weekend to think about it, I decided I just couldn’t let that score of 27 stand.  Not because I cared about my standings, but because I KNEW I could do better.  That simply wasn’t my best effort, which isn’t ever ok by me.

Monday is the last day to submit scores for the week, so I went in early for class.  I warmed up alone and set up my barbell.  This time, I knew I would need it.

I grabbed a judge and asked them to count and time me, and set out with one goal in mind.  Get thru one round.  45 reps in 10 minutes.  I knew if I made it through the dubs I was home free.

What a different experience the second time around.  I was stringing together doubles in sets of 3-4, and at around the 5 minute mark I was done with 30!  I flew through the over head movement, and got back on the rope as fast as I can.  With just under 4 minutes left, I knew I could make it through one more round of jumps.


Not only did I, but I managed a few more overheads before time ran out.

Final score, 78!!!

I won’t lie, I almost started crying.

See, it doesn’t matter to me that the top competitors in our region and the world managed 450+ reps.  It matters that I did something I had NEVER done before.  I let go of the “can’t” and found the will to figure it out.

That my friends, is what is beautiful about the Open.  So many of us do Crossfit to push ourselves out of our comfort zones, and then still end up sitting there anyway.  Sure, the zone has become bigger than what it maybe was before, but it’s still there unless we continually challenge ourselves.

I won’t rest.  I will grow.  I won’t fall victim to “can’t.”

Thanks Crossfit.

What happened to the workouts?!


Hey loyal readers!

And because there are a butt load of you, HEY NEW READERS!  Welcome aboard!

As you’ve probably seen, I’m a Crossfit addict who also does tri-sports (swim, bike and run), as well as blogs about the hilarious and disgusting pretty regularly.

I know we’re still at the start of the year, so we’re all still focused on our resolutions, which probably mean fitness and weight loss goals.  Right?  Right.  Focused.  Yep.  That’s me.

I swear I’m still working out daily, and doing some pretty awesomesauce things in all areas of my training, but you may have noticed I’m no longer posting daily workout recaps or updates.

There’s a few reasons for this, but the main one is that people are douchebags.  Right after the first of the year, I was getting comments from new readers about how slow my times were, how light my weights were, or how boring my posts were.  Obviously, this isn’t really motivating.  But it also let me take a step back and look at the content of my blog.

I want to make you laugh, and provide great stories about things health, fitness, and alcohol related.  (Because they SO go together, right?)  I don’t ever want to be boring, so to that end, I’m keeping track of my fitness elsewhere for the moment.

That’s not to say you won’t get recaps of really great workouts.  Once the Crossfit Open starts I probably won’t be able to contain myself.

I’m going to do my best to bring fun fresh content to you regularly, and if there’s ever anything you want to hear or know or read more about, just ask!  Your feedback, likes, and comments are what keep me posting and loving this blog.

Just don’t be a douchebag.  This is a douche free zone.

1.20.2014 Workouts

I have been such a lazy blogger.  I’m “temporarily retired” at the moment, which should mean I have gobs of time to update my blog and entertain my loyal readers, but what it actually seems to be translating into is that I’m NEVER at my computer.  Wow.  Who knew I wasn’t really THAT addicted to technology?

Anyhoo, rather that bore you to the point that you want to eat gobs of chocolate with all my workouts since last week, I’m just starting fresh with today.  Goals not really hit last week, but I made forward progress so I’m focusing on the positive.

SWOD:  Front Squat 5×5
3×10 single leg RDL
3×10 steps R and L in little circle band

Front Squat Was:
1×10 zombie @ 33
3×5@ 53
1×5@ 53

Still battling to get my “oomph” back.  I know the strength will come back eventually, but it’s frustrating as hell to be struggling with half of what I used to be able to squat no problem.

8 minute AMRAP
5 hang power cleans
5 shoulder to OH
**10 DL penalty every time you drop the bar**

Score:  Honestly, no idea?  I used 53 lbs (65 was Rx, and I could have done it, but I would have ended up doing a LOT of DL methinks).  I did 4 rounds total of DL, but literally could not tell ya how many rounds of the actual workout I did.  I kept breaking on something silly like my 3rd power clean, so my brain had to remember 10 deadlifts, then that I still needed to do 2 more cleans, so all the other numbers fell out of my head.

Oh well still a great workout.


First time on my bike outside in almost 10 weeks!  Due to a bunch of medical complications, I had to put riding on the back burner for a loooong time.  I was SO excited that it was sunny and warm enough today to get out there.

Did an easy 10 miles at a 15ish mph pace.  I’ve definitely lost some endurance, but man I LOVE my new bike.  I barely had a chance to break it in before my hiatus, and I’m really excited to put in some miles to get ready for an upcoming 65 mile ride the last week in March!

1.11.2014 Workouts

I just realized I’ve been still dating stuff 2013 haven’t I?  Man, need to get with it.

Proud of myself for clawing my way out of bed on Saturday and going to the class.  I usually avoid Saturday’s like the plague because sometimes they’re some sort of crazy hard partner workout and public puking isn’t really my thing, but in an effort to keep with my motivation for the week, I went.

I’m glad I did.

Warm Up:  Usual stuff.  This is a huge class so it’s always fun to see people I haven’t seen in forever.

WOD:  20 minute row

4000m in 21 minutes

The goal for today was just to go slow and steady and break up the lactic acid from the workout on Friday.  I was grateful for it.  The class actually did a 2.5 mile run, but since I’m not running at the moment, I just pulled the rower outside and did a nice steady state row.

This was probably the easiest pace I could manage without falling asleep.  I could have done this all day.

Good stuff.


1.8.2014 – 1.10.2014 Workouts

I don’t normally do posts with more than one day, but I’m a bit behind and figured I would do a quick catch-up-and-prove-I-really-did-it post.  🙂


First day back at my box in almost 7 weeks.  I almost didn’t go.  In fact, I put it off all the way until 4:30 before I finally worked up the nerve to do it.  I publicly called myself out to the group to give myself the accountability too.

Man I’m glad I went.

Warm Up:  Still the usual.  Except I felt like I might DIE half way thru.  That’s new.  Let’s hope that passes quickly.

Mobility:  Hamstring stretching with the bands.

SWOD:  Snatch Deadlift 5×5? @ 53 lbs

I honestly don’t remember the rep scheme on this.  Coach said to keep the weight at 55% of your 1 RM  Snatch, but my 1 RM Snatch IS 53 lbs, so I just went for it.  Obviously, this was really light, but my mantra quickly became “I want to be able to walk tomorrow” so I was ok with light.

DB Squat Cleans
DB Push Press

Time: 8:47 @ 10 lbs dumbells

The only movement I hate more than Wall Balls are DB squat cleans.  These bitches are my nemesis… and honestly the reason I almost didn’t go to class.  But I did them.  They sucked bad.  The whole workout sucked bad.  That’s what I get for taking so much time off.


Went to the 9 a.m. class.  I’m not working at the moment, so I’ve got a lot of flexibility with my schedule.  I LOVE my 6 a.m. peeps, but can’t convince myself to get out of bed that early when I have no real reason too.  I’m probably going to bounce around to a few of the classes to figure out where I fit best.

Warm Up:  Usual stuff.  Super awesome girl coach was coaching this class, which I liked.

SWOD:  Snatch Balance 5×3 @ 33 lbs

Again, I kept this really light.  I did make an attempt at 43 lbs but just couldn’t get my arms locked out fast enough.  After failing the rep I scaled it back and finished up at 33.  Lots of time to get stronger, and I want to be able to walk tomorrow (are we sensing a mantra here?)

10 minute AMRAP
5 ball slams
10 HR Push Ups
15 Hollow Rocks
20 Double unders (or 2 burpees + 20 single unders)

Score: 5+15 with 15 lbs ball and SU

I love AMRAPS.  You can’t finish last.  And I actually really liked this AMRAP.  The gymnastic-y movements tend to be my favorites.  I practiced DU’s for a few minutes before and still can’t do even one.  I want this skill bad.


Today went to the noon class.  Went out with hubs and another one of the boys last night and had a late (for me) night that had one too many hard ciders as part of the line up.  Sleeping in was my friend.

Turns out Super Awesome Girl Coach was coaching this class along with one of our 6 a.m. ladies, the New York Ninja, who is a new coach at our box.  I had heard a rumor that she got certified and was SO EXCITED to be in her class.  She is one of those amazingly athletic women that makes you want to either hug her or punch her when she gets her DU’s on her FIRST TRY EVER.  I remember when she and her hubs joined about a year ago, and I’m really excited to work with her.

So anyway, onto the workout.

Warm Up:  Usual Stuff + some fun hip mobility stretches from the Ninja.

20 minute AMRAP
5 power cleans
10 toes to bar
15 wall balls

Score: 185 @ 53 lbs on power cleans, toes to bar done on the ground, wall balls at 10 lbs

Obviously, I did this VERY scaled, and am glad I did.  Other than the t2b I physically could have done it Rx, but it would have taken me the full 20 minutes just to do the power cleans I think!

I love doing the Open workouts though.  Until the Open kicks off we’re going to be doing one every Friday.  I’m stoked.  I want to beat some of my scores from last year.  I am definitely not in as great of shape as I was last year, but I have over a month to improve as much as I can, and I can’t wait for the energy and excitement again this year.

1.3.2013 Workout

Happy birthday to my partner in crime, my bestie that convinced me to try Crossfit in the first place!

In honor of her, I agreed to visit her box and do her birthday workout with her tonight.  Little did I know that she’s a freaking SADIST and requested KAREN (that’s 150 wall balls for time kids!) as her birthday workout!

I still love her, but will think again when I promise a sweat sacrifice as a birthday gift.

Warm Up:  Pretty standard.  This is probably the coldest day of the whole winter so far in Florida, so even after the warm up, I wasn’t even close to warm.

SWOD:  Snatch 5×3

We did a pretty extensive snatch warm up with the PVC pipe and the empty bar to make sure we were really ready for this.

5×3 @ 33 lbs

I did a few of them as full squat snatches, but was having trouble getting my balance.  Obviously, I haven’t been to Crossfit in over a month and didn’t want to overdo it my first day back, so I changed to power snatches and added and OHS to work on my stability.

WOD:  Karen 150 wall balls for time

Time: 15:50ish at 120 wall balls- 90 with 15 lbs slam ball, 30 with 10 lbs slam ball

So I had every intention of doing this with a 10 lbs ball, as I know I’ve lost a lot of fitness from being out AND being sick for so long.  Unfortunately, there weren’t enough 10 lbs balls to go around, and there were folks far newer than me who needed and wanted the lighter weight.  I decided to be a good sport, but by about 60 reps in my legs were literally giving out.

I knew I wasn’t going to be able to finish this workout.  I hate to say that, but physically I was not able to do it.  My legs were shaking so bad by around the 100 rep mark I was doing singles and failed reps stuck at the bottom of the squat and unable to stand up.

When the birthday girl finished, I called it.  With 30 reps left to go.

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit disappointed, but I know that I gave it all that I had.

Now to foam roll myself so that I can walk, and WOD, again by Monday!

11.25.2013 Workouts


Back at Crossfit for the 6 a.m. class.  Love those guys, and actually missed them.  Didn’t so much miss the walking up at the butt crack of dawn and the vomit inducing workouts… ok so maybe I missed that too.

Warm Up:  The usual stuff.  Coach did tease us that after the holiday’s we’ll be changing it up.  Fun.  I love when we stick new stuff in the warm up because I usually find a new weakness I didn’t even know I had.

SWOD:  Front Squat 3×8
1×10@ 33 for zombie squats to warm up
1×8 @ 53
1×8 @ 63
1×8 @ 73

This wasn’t too bad.  I likely could have added a bit more weight for that last set, but I still struggle with the pressure of the bar on my throat during front squats.  I really really don’t like choking myself.

WOD: Diane
Handstand Push Ups

5:06 @93 and regular push ups

This was both a PR in time (18 seconds) and weight (10 lbs) from the last time I did this WOD.  I am super proud of that.  Gotta love progress.

I also looked back to see what I had to say about the last time we did this benchmarck in August and was really surprised to see what I wrote.  Apparently, at the time 83 lbs and push ups unscaled intimated me!  Today I didn’t even bat an eye about the push ups, and loaded my bar with 83 right off the bat.  With a little encouragement from a class mate I added more, and easily managed the weight.

Progress is really an awesome feeling.


Post-Crossfit swim.  Honestly, I really REALLY wasn’t feeling it today at all, so I just hopped in and swam 1500 straight.  About half way thru a guy jumped in and raced me.  I won.

I have no idea if he knows we were racing or not.

1500m in about 35 mins


11 miles at a 15ish pace with the crew.  The 22 mph winds were really a nice touch.  Ok, not really.  They really blew.  Heh heh. See what I did there?